Sunday, March 4, 2012



"When you refuse to forgive yourself for being the way you are, doing the things that you do, or never doing or being enough, you make it almost impossible to actually change. Loving and forgiving yourself where you are, at this very moment, is the starting point for moving forward and changing everything. 
You have to start from forgiveness in your own heart and then move towards areas of your life that you would like to become better."

Chapter 7, 40 Days and a Horse, Forgiveness.
Christa Black - "God Loves Ugly"

I know this is my fault.
I needed time to think about each part of the deal. 
Finally, I fall in love.
I was too shy to admit the truth.I was afraid to suffer as the past again. I was terrified by the future.

How do I feel now ?
Guilty, ashamed, stupid, alone, unloved, ugly and angry against myself ...

I am sorry.
Not sure I am ready to forgive to myself yet.
Not sure I am too courageous to do.
It's such a bad behavior and I know it.
too weak to see myself in the mirror and tell the words.
Not sure I deserve it.

Next Sub-Chapter of the book: Freedom.


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